Fatherhood

Loose Review: Battlestar Galactica

Ever since Milton Berle jumped from radio to the then fledgling National Broadcast Company (NBC) in 1948, the portrayal of women on television has been a leading subject for many stakeholders. Uncle Miltie had no way of knowing his era’s stereotypical depiction of women on television would spark many decades of debate, evolution, and change. Milton was known as “Mr. Television” and had upwards of 2 million viewers per night. In a 2000 interview on the Howard Stern show, uncle Miltie said, “Who would have thought my dressing in drag all those years ago would spark the beginning of feminism?” Seeing Uncle Miltie in drag makes me tingle in new ways I don't understand. Those often forgotten days of yore live on.

Fast forward 56 years and now we have Battlestar Galactica (2004 TV series) airing on the sci-fi channel. A 1997 study asserts that there are 2.4 times as many male characters in television as females. Such studies were often conducted by bored and ugly housewives (scientifically known as "Swamp-Donkeys") with nothing better to do than piss, moan, and breath up all the oxygen of the beautiful people. Battlestar Galactica blows this ratio out of the water with 1.25 times as many female characters as males. While this particular TV show seems to be the exception to the rule, there is much wisdom to be gained by further analysis and a system of "bonerness" ratings.

Three of the main characters are female, two of which were born that way. The president of the Twelve Colonies, Laura Roslin (bornerness rating: a gift "C"), has led her people with great strength and conviction through unspeakable horrors and hardships - all while battling breast cancer and a fleet wide vibrator shortage. Number Six (bornerness rating: "A minus") is also a strong female and enjoys whoring it up, but for different reasons. She is one half of the main protagonist duo who seeks to undermine the unity president Roslin has worked so hard to maintain. Did I mention she is immortal and has a third eye right above her vagina? At least she did until recently. Kara "Starbuck" Thrace (bornerness rating: "B") has an iron will and stubbornness unparalleled or unmatched by any other character in this TV show. I can't say I know for a fact she does not have three separate genitals - all different sexes. There's that tingle again...

These females are in stark contrast the original Battlestar Galactica (1978 TV series) in many ways. For example, 100% of the main characters were male (bornerness rating: "F"). What few females (bornerness rating: "D" due to questionable 70's hygiene) there were where often relegated to lesser background roles and in some cases, scantily clad eye-candy for the much coveted viewers – males 18 to 30. The dynamic of Powerless/Passive versus Aggressive/Macho is exploited in this TV to almost comical effect. And don't get me started about "70's bush."

Field Report: Frisco Government Tards

I was born and raised in Southern California. I joined the Marine Corps when I was 17 years old and after my enlistment was over, I did not settle in California. Instead I settled in the Portland metro area of Oregon. Speaking only for myself, I can say as a California refugee I am utterly ashamed and embarrassed of the city of San Francisco.

San Francisco always seems to be mired in controversy or some other wackiness. The latest highly publicized misstep in San Francisco revolves around their sanctuary city status. The San Francisco government, courts as well as a California Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals, on the surface, appears to go out of its way to generate controversy.

My personal opinion is government should stay the heck out of my life. I don’t need to be regulated because I, as a self-sustaining sovereign individual, have the ability to think on my own and don’t think elected officials or the courts need to tell me what’s best for me, my family, or anything else for that matter.

Forced segregation occurs when my child is not able to attend the school across the street from my house. The bureaucratic idiot buffoonery behind the reasons only shine a light on the ill thought attempt at social engineering. At least be subtle about it!

As you can tell I have very strong feelings about this subject. You should also know I don’t have any kids, but am a rational thinking adult who has the ability to determine where, how and why my offspring should receive their education based on common sense. This is just another stone on the scales tipping in favor of home schooling - but the teachers unions staunchly oppose any education outside of their control. Home schooling also shrinks the student dating pool for teachers.

No persuasive argument has been presented to explain why my child can go to school across the street from my house, but rather, have to travel several miles or more to school that is not convenient. My property taxes go to pay for the school within my district. Why then, am I forced to pay for a service that I am not receiving because my child’s going to school outside of our school property tax zone?

It is more noise-hole lunacy (see Noise-hole posting) and I am not for it. I am, however, for busty wet teeshirt contests. Mmmmmm, tits.

Quantum Lux for President!

Guess who's throwing their hat into the race for the White House? That's right ignorant masses, your own Quantum Lux! Please inform your slack-jawed family and mouth-breather friends. There may be some cake in it for you. Vote Lux!